Original
Western Astrology

Chiron Conjunct Neptune in Aquarius: Smells Like Teen Angst in Adults

by Sherene Schostak January 31, 2009 05:09 PM EST
"I feel stupid and contagious...." -- K.Cobain
I don't care if you're fourteen or forty, social anxieties born of early teen traumas never truly die, do they? With Chiron conjunct Neptune in Aquarius, it's like getting a gallon of salt poured into each and every social rejection wound you've ever had to endure. The fact that Mercury is concurrently retrograde only makes insecure matters worse. Waiting for a response or reply that doesn't come in a timely, and if you're one of the less patient zodiac animals out there (I say animals because of course the human and inanimate object zodiac signs are too civilized to throw tantrums), anything beyond what it takes to type out a Twitter or Facebook status update is fodder for paranoia.
Here's a very Aquarian (it is my north node after all) question to pose: Is it just me, or is everyone feeling slightly socially retarded lately? Of course the Mercury retrograde does wonders for our communication--but lately everyone has been asking me what to do about this surge of insecurities galore? I think the solution is to truly move toward the current Sun, Jupiter, North Node conjunction in Aquarius screaming at us to stop worrying what others think--not in that "I'm a non-conformist and so are all of the rest of my friends" kind of way, but in an authentic share your unique talents and generosity for the good of something greater kind of way. The hardest thing is putting something out there and then forgetting about it. In the Bhagavad Gita, one of the greatest teachings is to let go of the fruits of our action by not attaching the egotistical identification of "the doer". It's very apropos to the current north node in Aquarius: we need to do our thing and let it go without attachment to the outcome. If we just think of ourselves as creative channels, we're less prone to self consciousness and judgment. If we catch ourselves in the "how ya like me now" ego snares-- constantly checking and re-checking for feedback, comments, ratings, stars, testimonials, or other such versions of our inner Simon Cowell projected on to comment boxes, we're asking for an ego trip straight to hell.
I'm convinced the reason Facebook and other social networking sites are so popular now is largely in part due to the cosmological emphasis on the Leo/Aquarius polarity. What with several eclipses, the lunar nodes and Neptune in Aquarius, major themes include: bringing people together, DIY, and ensuring that we all have our fifteen minutes of fame. The Leo part of our nature always craves more attention-- with an incessant demand for proof that we are in fact adored and special in that superstar/rock star kind of way. Whereas our inner Aquarian needs to belong to something greater, build community, and create something revolutionary in the world that brings more love and attention to everyone involved. It's no mistake that our current sexy Prez (that's officially his new tag in this blog) has a Leo Sun with Aquarius rising!
As children we are in our full "look at me, look at me" splendor! After enough painful social traumas and realizations that it's lonely at the top, and without a contingency to back us up when the envy, jealousy and competitive backlash rears its ugly head, we quickly learn the benefits of evolving into our Aquarian nature and realizing there are more important things in life beyond being cute, talented and adored. If those are our main goals, we're doomed to go Britney(tag for an official syndrome derived from too much attention and adoration leading you to crazy behaviors like shot-gun weddings and shaving your head).
Going beyond our adolescent angst of needing to fit in or belong and pretending we don't care, when of course deep down we all do, can only be cured with heaps of astrological Vitamin D--the self love lessons of Leo and the rebellious/experimental instincts of Aquarius. Whenever I catch myself on the verge of mentally trashing something I've put out there for the collective to view (judge), I have to remind myselves (that was a bona fide Freudian slip typo--but I'm keeping it for the sake of the current argument) what Martha Graham reiterated over and over to her students: it's not up to us to decide how good it is, or how it compares to the rest, but to simply keep the channel open or our unique expression will forever be lost.
ll) question to pose: Is it just me, or is everyone feeling slightly socially retarded lately? Of course the Mercury retrograde does wonders for our communication--but lately everyone has been asking me what to do about this surge of insecurities galore? I think the solution is to truly move toward the current Sun, Jupiter, North Node conjunction in Aquarius screaming at us to stop worrying what others think--not in that "I'm a non-conformist and so are all of the rest of my friends" kind of way, but in an authentic share your unique talents and generosity for the good of something greaterkind of way. The hardest thing is putting something out there and then forgetting about it. In the Bhagavad Gita, one of the greatest teachings is to let go of the fruits of our action by not attaching the egotistical identification of "the doer". It's very apropos to the current north node in Aquarius: we need to do our thing and let it go without attachment to the outcome. If we just think of ourselves as creative channels, we're less prone to self consciousness and judgment. If we catch ourselves in the "how ya like me now" ego snares-- constantly checking and re-checking for feedback, comments, ratings, stars, testimonials, or other such versions of our inner Simon Cowell projected on to comment boxes, we're asking for an ego trip straight to hell.
I'm convinced the reason Facebook and other social networking sites are so popular now is largely in part due to the cosmological emphasis on the Leo/Aquarius polarity. What with several eclipses, the lunar nodes and Neptune in Aquarius, major themes include: bringing people together, DIY, and ensuring that we all have our fifteen minutes of fame. The Leo part of our nature always craves more attention-- with an incessant demand for proof that we are in fact adored and special in that superstar/rock star kind of way. Whereas our inner Aquarian needs to belong to something greater, build community, and create something revolutionary in the world that brings more love and attention to everyone involved. It's no mistake that our current sexy Prez (that's officially his new tag in this blog) has a Leo Sun with Aquarius rising!
As children we are in our full "look at me, look at me" splendor! After enough painful social traumas and realizations that it's lonely at the top, and without a contingency to back us up when the envy, jealousy and competitive backlash rears its ugly head, we quickly learn the benefits of evolving into our Aquarian nature and realizing there are more important things in life beyond being cute, talented and adored. If those are our main goals, we're doomed to go Britney(tag for an official syndrome derived from too much attention and adoration leading you to crazy behaviors like shot-gun weddings and shaving your head).
Going beyond our adolescent angst of needing to fit in or belong and pretending we don't care, when of course deep down we all do, can only be cured with heaps of astrological Vitamin D -- the self love lessons of Leo and the rebellious/experimental instincts of Aquarius. Whenever I catch myself on the verge of mentally trashing something I've put out there for the collective to view (judge), I have to remind myselves (that was a bona fide Freudian slip typo--but I'm keeping it for the sake of the current argument) what Martha Graham reiterated over and over to her students: it's not up to us to decide how good it is, or how it compares to the rest, but to simply keep the channel open or our unique expression will forever be lost.
 
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