Obviously no one is exempt from feelings of betrayal, and the fallout can be devastating for all involved. Oprah recently apologized to James Frey for 'lambasting him' on her show, and she did so because Vanity Fair reports, she felt betrayed.
I've been exploring betrayals through Liz Greene's work on triangles. Having just received her book, Relationships & How To Survive Them, fresh off the boat from UK, Liz makes getting to the bottom of triangles painfully, psychologically clear: there are no victims, no murderers and no one at fault. Unless you want to stay stuck (then it's their fault). It seems the only way to not become embittered or vengeful or righteous is to mine the betrayal for substance.We can always choose: to look beyond the anger, guilt or shame and inquire as to why a betrayal was necessary, or stay divided and learn nothing at all. The message of the psyche/self is integration. With betrayal, the stakes of integration suddenly get really high, and integrate we will, in one way or another.
The four categories of Triangles shine light on the motivating forces at work in a triangle. The astrological associations are my own, and are easily applied to transits to the natal chart, as the birth chart itself.
Family Triangle. A triangle with origins in the relationship with the primary parents, having repercussions in adult relationship. The parent may have had a split identity (committed dad vs. freedom-loving dad) and now the conflict shows up in the partner's need for freedom, for example.
Chart configurations to consider: Moon and or Venus/Uranus, Moon and or Venus/Saturn, Moon and or Venus/Pluto.
Power & Defensive Triangle. This triangle is found when a person carries on two relationships because they fear they might be abandoned by one of them.
Chart configurations to consider: Chiron/Venus and Saturn/Venus, Venus/Pluto.
Pursuit of the Unobtainable Triangle. The motivation here is often artistic or spiritual - as in the case of unobtainable love, wanting something we can't have may actually be a mystical longing or creative urge. Examples: artists and their muse, or people who choose partners who are out of reach. The dual meaning of the fifth house of the astrological chart as both lovers and art-making illuminates the connection between the creative urge and the lover relationship.
Chart configurations to consider: Venus/Neptune, Moon/Neptune, Sun/Neptune.
The Triangle of the Unlived Life. Every triangle has this triangle at it's core - something is not being recognized or lived within the psyche. Betrayal allows the recognition of 'what's been missing' to occur. What's been missing is an understanding about a dimension of our self.
Chart configurations to consider: All 'challenging' configurations that remain unintegrated with the rest of the chart/person, perhaps an unaspected or least aspected planet.
Up Next: The Resolution of Triangles