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Sex Signs: Is My Marriage in Trouble?

by Kiki T. February 13, 2012 12:15 AM EST
Sex Signs: Is My Marriage in Trouble?
I’m a Sagittarius and married for two years now. My husband is a Scorpio and is reliable, trustworthy and takes good care of me. We have many of the same interests and goals and we generally enjoy spending time together. I try hard to be a good wife and show him how much I appreciate everything he does for me, and how much I love him. He really is a wonderful person and I adore him, but we are experiencing a rough patch now.

In the last few months, I have started to feel insecure with our marriage. He refuses to discuss his feelings, insisting words can’t express feelings. I do understand this, but sometimes I feel it’s important to try and open up. Most the time I am confident that he loves me and would never hurt me, but sometimes I wonder how he really feels and if our marriage is ending. He has a bit of a temper, and sometimes his mood will turn sour rather quickly just by me asking him a simple question. I never know what question or comment will upset him and I feel like I have to tiptoe around him.

Our sex life is also seriously lacking and I feel constantly rejected by him, which is also taking a toll on my self-esteem. I do not know if he’s depressed or having a hard time at work, or if he is just annoyed by me. Sometimes we talk about our future and he seems cheerful, but he won’t talk about his feelings, or why he isn't interested in sex anymore. The point is, I want to save my marriage, but I don't know how to overcome this obstacle. It is hard to just sit back and relax when the person you love seems so distant and uninterested.

-- Distressed

Dear Distressed,
Welcome to the world of Scorpio, where being vulnerable is a toxic danger zone they dare not tread, as it’s their ultimate Pandora’s Box. So instead of trying to draw blood from a stone, as any idealistic Sag would, just ease up and give him space. Don’t feel the pressure to always have him be a certain way, because backing off will ultimately make him see he has the space to think his thoughts and come around when he wants to. Yes, chances are he is going through some sort of dark time, which all Scorpios go through sporadically and can be triggered by all ranges of issues that are serious to silly, but it’s not for you to judge.

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As a Sagittarius, your style is to talk and get it out in the open. After all, your sign rules truth and is the complementary sign to communications. His is the sign of secrets, intensity and intimacy. This means you both have a different styles in conquering problems, so while you have voiced your opinions, now you just have to sit back and wait it out. Yes, frustrating and annoying, but that is how it goes with Scorpio. They need to plummet to their bottom before coming back to the top.

As for tackling the sex issue, instead of making it a big issue you want to discuss, take action and see what happens. As the sign of spontaneity and adventure, you’re a lady who can surprise him at the door in your birthday suit when he comes home or something just as unexpected and see what he does. The efforts you put out can help you decipher his problem -- as in you doing what you can to muster up the energy in the boudoir, to see if he reacts. Even if after this he makes no response, then at least you know you’ve put out the efforts.

Ultimately, Scorpio does what he wants without showing much emotion. But know he’s also the sign of persistence and if he takes your marriage for real, he will eventually come around and start to open himself in a way that shows he wants to be a team. However, until you allow him to make those moves, there are no secrets buttons to push with this sign of mystery.

-- Kiki

If you are having any astrological dilemma and would like insight from Astrosexologist Kiki T., send those letters over to her @

Astrosexologist Kiki T. is author of the ultimate astral to woo, coo, do and even shoo any man in the universe,
The Celestial Sexpot’s Handbook.
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