The Top 5 Traits of the Enduring Couple

My husband and I have mutual affection for older couples; we adore those elegant elder couples who’ve weathered time so gracefully, and love observing those little private moments they share. He, leading her by the hand. She, complaining about being too cold for the millionth time in their shared life, and would he please get her a cup of tea?

Not to romanticize growing old together. It takes a lot of work to get to that stage -- hence my fascination. Because as we partner and plan to grow old together, a sure thing is never really a sure thing, is it? Promises are made -- and broken.

No planetary transit reminds us of the power of a vow more than Saturn currently in the sign of Libra (October 29, 2009 through October 5, 2012). This is the planet of dedication. In Libra, Saturn asks us to get real in our relationships, and to commit to those we love. If you’re wondering if you two have what it takes to make it to the finish line, Saturn answers.

The enduring couple:

1. Are tolerant and accepting of each other.
The enduring couple understands there will be things that will push our buttons, but they don’t get hung up. Accepting another’s differences is loving them for who they are, not trying to change them. Our partner will stretch us, yet we accept each other in total.

2. Appreciate each other.
Meister Eckhart said, if the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you," that would suffice. My husband is a regular clown. I am blessed to have a companion for whom fun and pleasure is ever ready, always in steady supply, and I know it! I don’t forget to appreciate this in him. Likewise, I know he appreciates a playmate and all I bring into his life because he shows me in words and action on a regular basis.

3. Are one another’s best friends.
Charlotte Kasl, author of If the Buddha Married says long-term couples start out as best friends and endure for this reason. Our partners are the people we confide in, tell our stories to, and are our preferred companion of choice. We are first and foremost, friends.

4. Are together, but lead their own lives.
We don’t have to share the same interests to enjoy each other’s company. Astrology reminds us of how different we are, that we each have different soul karma and life purpose. We join into an “us” consciousness but we are also free to lead our own lives.

5. Hold up a mirror of our most excellent self.
Many of us are more likely to downplay our strengths, and without people who can see us clearly some of us would miss out on our strengths altogether! To behold our partner’s most excellent self, we see the best in them but we’re also real. We see them clearly.