When we consider primary relationships that will later influence our adult relationships, we think of our parents or primary caregivers. But sibling relationship can as easily influence dynamics with our spouse, friendships-- and all of our relationships.
Astrologer Brian Clark calls the Third, Seventh and Eleventh Houses the houses of equal relationship and the Third House/Gemini, specifically influences our adult relationships. That the Third House sibling relationship has anything to do with our other relationships at all may at first seem surprising --given that this house is better known for it's more unsexy descriptors of self-expression, mind, thought, information, short trips, and neighbors. How could this be related to love & relationship? A discussion on Donna Cunningham’s Skywriter blog about siblings got me thinking; if our first equal relationship is with our brother or sister, mightn’t the initial imprint our sibling had on our first worldview influence how we perceive our relatonships now? If our big brother was successful in everything he did, Zeus-like and could do no wrong according to mom and dad, big brother is equally someone we love and aspire to be as well as our inimical other half, reminding us of our own limitations. Our siblings can not only shape our self-perception for better or worse, we subconsciously bring our Cain (or Abel) sibling with us wherever we go later in life because our sibling presents us with the dichotomies, paradoxes and dualities that occur in human relationship. They punch us in the arm; we take the consequences; they self-destruct and get attention for it; we are peace-loving and get the short end of the stick. The Devil (or Angel) sibling on our shoulder always offers a maddeningly contrary version of the story. Just like the Third House.
According to Astrologer Brian Clark, the Third House/Gemini and Mercury correlates describe “the restless search for the missing twin”. That our missing half is out there isn’t an unusual notion- it’s at the heart of the archetypal soul mate myths but we rarely think of our missing twin as a sibling figure. And remember, because the sibling is archetypal, every one of us has a missing twin-- regardless of whether you have a sibling or not in this life.
Who is your missing twin?
(If you don't know your birth chart, just look at the descriptions.)
Sun in/Leo on Third House cusp: The golden child or autocrat; the one who gets positive attention for being special or talented.
Moon in /Cancer on Third House cusp: The cupcake, crybaby or mother-attached; the one who demands emotional attention.
Mercury in/Gemini on Third House cusp: The twin; the smart/wily one who gets away with/does everything you don’t.
Venus in/Libra or Taurus on Third House cusp: The artist or beauty (Libra), sweetpea or silent one; the one who receives the love, affection & adoration.
Mars in/Aries on Third House cusp: The muck-racker or little devil; the one whose emergencies, aggression or devilish behavior gets attention.
Jupiter in/Sagittarius on Third House cusp: The enthusiastic evangelist, the lucky one; the one who can do no wrong/ always comes up smelling like roses.
Saturn in/Capricorn on Third House cusp: The little adult or emotionally absent one; the one who tries to overcompensate for lack of structure or fill the shoes of a missing parent.
Uranus in/Aquarius on Third House cusp: The misfit, wild chiild or alien; the one who gets attention for being unpredictable, troubled or different.
Neptune in/Pisces on Third House cusp: The dreamer, escapist or poet; the one whose addictions, struggles and confusion takes the attention of the family.
Pluto in/Scorpio on Third House cusp: The psychologist, scapegoat or black sheep; the one who carries the family shadow, is the voice of the burning bush.
Questions: Can you see how the missing twin has influenced other relationships? Can you see how your missing half is helping you to see your own contradictions?
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Sherene Schostak is a Jungian psychotherapist, author and metaphysician who specializes in helping creative artists transform their addictions and blocks. She has been in private practice in New York City for the past 13 years consulting, writing and... read more