Your Relationship Can Survive Uranus-Pluto: 5 Tips

A Chinese blessing says, ‘May you live in interesting times.’ A curse or a blessing, these are the interesting times.The Uranus-Pluto square is putting tension on all of our systems, governments and institutions, our marriages and relationships. If you’re experiencing a Uranus-Pluto square in your relationship life, interesting is likely the most neutral thing you could possibly say…So what should you expect when the Uranus-Pluto square links up with your ASC-DSC, personal planets Mars, Moon, Venus and/or planets ruling your relationship houses? Dramatic changes that pull on all of your resources, and heart-wrenching honesty. What else?

1. Expect long-standing issues to come to a head.

In-law problems, commitment questions, name your gripe. If the problem or issue has been odiously difficult, hard to face and it’s been present for a long time or the duration of your relationship, you will feel the pressure of this square. This is the time to dig in with honesty and address the fact that neither of you can move forward in this relationship without dealing with the elephant in the room.

2. Don’t wait to work on your relationship until it hurts so bad that the relationship is irreparably damaged or destroyed.

In relationship, there are times when we are playing with fire and we have no idea how dangerously close we are to setting our entire relationship aflame. A common one: we develop a flirtation with someone outside of our relationship and instead of talking about our needs and desires that aren’t getting met within our relationship, and bringing that to our partner, we gravitate toward another.

On the flip side, some of us “soldier on” in situations that scream for intervention and support.  How high is your tolerance for pain? The longer you are able to put up with “it”, the greater the cost to your self-esteem & happiness.

3. Ask for help.

People need people. One of the more difficult things to do is to admit just how bad it’s gotten and ask for support. Some people are too embarrassed, or consider help a luxury they cannot afford– no, no and no! After barely surviving Round 1 of the Pluto-Uranus square, I have two coaches, two mentors, and a kick-a** therapist --and I am not an independently wealthy woman. Trust me: life gets better with support.

4. Create more authenticity (Uranus) and honesty (Pluto) in your partnerships.

The little honest voice of the Self may start out soft, but it gets louder and louder as time goes on. This is the voice of Truth, of Authenticity -and it's your real voice. No matter how uncomfortable it is for the other person to hear how things need to change for you, no matter how hard it is for you to speak & name the hard truths, it’s necessary.  This is the bottom line of the Uranus-Pluto square.

5. Be flexible with one another. You are in a period of sustained change.

Having Uranus-Pluto in your partnership is like remodeling a house. You can have plans, but if you are not fully present to the daily grunt work, it will never work. Accept that your relationship is in a sustained period of change, requiring ongoing adaptations and remarkable levels of flexibility. Whether you’ll be together tomorrow is not as important as doing the work today, and celebrating little milestones. What matters is honestly working with what is arising, right now.