Do you often find yourself wondering what food to cook, how to cook it, and even that dreaded question—how much of it? It’s a daily struggle for all of us, but need not be with our food horoscope. Satisfaction is only a click away!
Aries
You sometimes need to overcome many obstacles to reach your goals. But perseverance will get you past temptation. So walk the gauntlet of donut shops, Mexican restaurants and Jewish delis today. The organic salad bar is only a block away.
Taurus
Indulge your inner animal today. You'll want something naughty and Dutch, preferably from Amsterdam. So bring home a box of Dutch chocolate tonight and go wild. Belgian will do just as well if you can't find something from Holland.
Gemini
Your neighbors may be complaining about strange nocturnal noises coming from your apartment, sounds that are primal and somewhat animalistic. Let them think what they want; that won't stop you from eating take-out shrimp chow mein in bed.
Cancer
You'll be captain of the ship today. But you'll be like those skippers on 'The Deadliest Catch' and not the one from 'Gilligan's Island.' Then you'll have all the Alaskan King Crab legs you can eat and not have to share them with that dumb Gilligan.
Leo
You may spend like a celebrity but that doesn't mean you can afford it. So don't order the Lobster Thermidor at a fancy four-star just to impress friends. Even B-list celebrities wouldn't be forced to wash dishes if they couldn't pay.
Virgo
To you French fries constitute foreign cuisine. But there's more to it than that, so go international today. No, Chinese chicken salad doesn't actually come from China, but just keep believing that if it helps.
Libra
Too much eating, drinking and making merry was way too much. Those love handles need their own zip code! It could be time to revert back to salads, fruit, yogurt and lean proteins. It's either that or a whole new wardrobe.
Scorpio
Patience will indeed be a virtue today. You'll wait and wait until you're bursting at the seams. But you'll finally get home and the aroma of shrimp gumbo that's been slow cooking all day will hit you in the face. Then you won't wait to dig in.
Sagittarius
There are better ways of dealing with recent heartbreak than listening to Pink Floyd's 'The Wall' on continuous loop. Tomato soup and a grilled cheese sandwich will be a tastier and much less morose way of drowning your sorrows.
Capricorn
Teaching your kids cooking basics is always fun. So let them help you prepare simple meals like meatloaf or tuna casserole. They'll learn a valuable new skill and some day soon you'll come home and dinner will be waiting for you for a change.
Aquarius
Indulge in culinary eccentricities from around the world tonight. You'll have many choices: live octopus from Korea, blood dumplings from Sweden or American Rocky Mountain oysters. Funny, they don't taste like oysters.
Pisces
Grab yourself some hot dogs and marshmallows today. You can put them to good use tonight when you set all those bogus love letters ablaze. On second thought, forget the wienies. A bonfire that big could roast an entire pig!
